[ti:Alfred's Theme] [ar:Eminem] [al:Music To Be Murdered By - Side B (Deluxe Edition)] [by:] [offset:0] [00:00.00]Alfred's Theme (Explicit) - Eminem [00:03.23]Lyrics by：M Mathers/L. Resto/C Gounod [00:06.46]Composed by：M Mathers/L. Resto/C Gounod [00:09.69]Before I check the mic [00:10.89]Check check one two [00:11.61]I give it an extra swipe with a Lysol disinfectant wipe [00:14.59]Good evening [00:15.31]Coronavirus in effect tonight [00:17.13]Antiseptics on deck I got every type [00:19.41]Yeah [00:19.67]I throw on my tux then I Yeah give zero f**ks then I [00:22.03]Yeah [00:22.20]Act like a jockstrap Uh cup my nuts then I [00:24.28]Yeah [00:24.46]Check my ball hair What make sure it's all there [00:26.61]Yeah [00:26.88]Then call the pallbearer [00:27.73]Yeah [00:28.03]It's Music to Be Murdered By again why stop [00:30.40]Overkill like a pipe bomb in your pine box [00:32.82]You're all hitched to my cock [00:34.08]What [00:34.37]Went from punchin' a time clock to getting my shot [00:36.82]Then treated it like a cyclops [00:38.68]Like it's the only one I Only one eye got [00:40.72]And my thoughts are like nines cocked [00:42.22]Chk-chk [00:42.49]Every line's obscene pervertedest mind got the dirtiest rhyme stocked [00:45.70]That's why there's parental advising Visine every time I drop [00:48.96]Eye drop [00:49.38]So throw on the theme to Alfred I'll channel him like the Panama Canal [00:52.92]But how could I get up in arms about you s [00:54.99]Aying trash is all that I put out [00:56.67]B***h I still get the bag when I'm putting garbage out [00:59.14]Plus the potty mouth I'm not about to wash it out [01:01.38]The filthiest so all this talk about I'm washed up how preposterous [01:03.91]Because if cleanliness is next to godliness [01:05.94]It's obvious that it's impossible for me to be beside myself [01:09.12]And I'm 'bout that capital like a proper noun [01:11.34]Still on top the pile [01:12.71]Got me sitting on numbers like a pocket dial [01:15.09]Quick to call you out on your bulls**t [01:17.21]Don't make me give that crock a dial [01:18.95]'Cause if I do it's see you later alligator [01:20.69]Made it out the trailer then I made a vow to cater to no one [01:23.77]So hate I've gained about the same amount that's in my bank account [01:26.07]So here's some more s**t for you to complain about I say the [01:28.74]Bars that never slack but always get attacked [01:30.70]Yeah [01:30.96]I think they're gunnin' for me it's startin' to feel like that [01:33.23]Like I'm marked 'cause when I rap [01:34.50]It's like fallin' on my back in a tar pit [01:36.33]'Cause I have this target on my back [01:38.30]Ew yuck [01:38.82]But if I ever double-crossed my fans and lost my Stans [01:41.46]I'd probably pop five Xans [01:42.79]Yeah [01:43.32]Go in my garage start my van [01:45.05]Inhale as much carbon monoxide and exhaust I can [01:48.08]And doze off like snores [01:49.32]But odds like that with these thoughts [01:51.07]I have's like a giant getting squashed by ants [01:53.44]If this is the test of time I'd pass with flying colors [01:56.23]Like I just tossed my crayons [01:58.14]Tossed my crayons [01:58.94]Small medium and large size cans [02:00.52]Sanitizers of all types brands cost nine bands [02:03.03]Which is a small price for Lysol wipes and [02:05.37]If my palms brush across my pants I wash my hands [02:08.13]S**t hold on man [02:10.97]Motherf**ker [02:12.98]Happy birthday to [02:15.10]F**k [02:15.62]Shh quiet [02:16.26]I sit in silence in candlelit environments [02:18.35]Sipping Wild Irish while getting violent [02:20.39]Homicidal visions when I'm spitting like this [02:22.64]But really I'm just fulfilling my wish of killing rhymes [02:25.31]Which is really childish and silly but I'm really like this [02:27.69]I'm giving nightmares to Billie Eilish I'm Diddy's side b***h [02:30.80]What the f**k Hold on wait [02:32.44]"I'm Diddy's side b***h" [02:33.49]Oh I'm still east side b***h [02:35.50]So until the E-N-D since EPMD [02:37.97]Been givin' y'all the business Yeah D-R-E and me [02:40.38]Yup [02:40.41]From the MMLP to MTBMB [02:43.03]B***h [02:43.41]B***h it's 2020 you still ain't seein' me [02:45.14]Haha [02:45.48]So call me Santa Clause [02:46.55]Santa Clause [02:46.98]'Cause at the present Yeah I out-rap 'em all I'm at the mall [02:50.37]Got your b***h in a bathroom stall she could suck a basketball [02:52.59]Uh [02:52.93]Through a plastic straw Yeah with a fractured jaw [02:55.19]D**n [02:55.46]My **** is coat check Ha she wanna jack it off [02:57.51]Yeah [02:57.83]I'm so far past the bar I should practice law [03:00.82]Mentally I'm f**ked up generally [03:02.60]General Lee [03:02.95]Duh [03:03.12]Dukes of Hazzard car Yeah get the cadaver dogs [03:05.16]'Cause this is murder murder and you'll get murked murked [03:07.69]This music 'bout to kill you brr brr [03:09.91]Brr [03:10.23]This chicken hit my phone she said "Chirp chirp" [03:12.60]I said "Hut hut hike your skirt skirt" [03:14.97]Then go eat some worms like the early bird [03:17.60]What the f**k is love That's a dirty word [03:20.03]Make me fall in it there's not a girl on Earth [03:22.54]Or any other planet that's a world of hurt [03:24.94]And I won't buy a designer 'cause I don't pander [03:27.45]Panda [03:27.73]But I'm back with so many knots I need a chiropractor [03:29.87]D**n [03:30.06]And this the final chapter 'cause I'm either frying after [03:32.27]Or they gon' give me the needle What like a vinyl scratcher [03:35.01]DJ [03:35.44]Yeah I'm a card like Hallmark [03:37.37]At Walmart with a small cart buying wall art [03:39.83]And y'all who claim to be dogs aren't [03:41.54]No bite like a tree mostly just all bark arf arf [03:44.69]But y'all pickin' the wrong tree they call me dog because I'm barking [03:48.77]Bar king bark bark barking [03:50.16]And I got a lot yeah like where cars park [03:52.37]I'd describe it as bowling Why ball hard [03:54.48]Ball's hard [03:55.05]'Cause the gutter's where my mind is and when [03:56.83]It's in this frame better split like the five and the ten [03:59.24]'Cause without a second to spare I'm strikin' again [04:01.59]And when the beat is up my alley I go right for the pens [04:03.92]Pins [04:04.10]The cypher begins [04:04.95]I'm talkin' smack like heroin the mic's a syringe [04:07.36]It's like a binge Vicodin I would liken to tin [04:09.85]My mind is a recycling bin [04:11.42]There's no place I never been [04:12.91]But I never budge and I never bend [04:14.87]You hyperextend on me this game's life it depends [04:17.39]Like adult diapers for men [04:18.92]Even when I'm rappin' less stellar [04:20.61]It's sour grapes I still whine I'm the best seller [04:23.02]Cellar [04:23.14]Like a trey deuce spray you as these shots penetrate through Dre's booth [04:26.25]And go straight through your grapefruit no escape route [04:28.54]So you won't leave here just scathed with a few scrape wounds [04:30.93]Your a*s is grass and I am not gonna graze you [04:33.43]But if bars were semi-mac's I'd be the Mad Hatter [04:35.78]'Cause I got so many caps and you don't have any straps [04:38.30]Nah [04:38.51]So you'd be a fitted Yeah so don't act like you fittin' to snap [04:40.98]B***h I'll pee P on your head like a Phillies hat [04:43.28]Haha [04:43.49]No stoppin' me you're on a window shopping spree [04:45.94]B***h you probably go broke at the Dollar Tree [04:48.38]You never buy s**t all you ever cop's a plea [04:50.87]You're always punkin' out like Halloween [04:53.39]You rather opt to flee you need to stop it punk [04:56.07]Homie you're not a G act like you got the pump [04:58.34]And you're gonna cock the heat or get the Glock and dump [05:00.80]B***h if you shot a tree you wouldn't pop the trunk [05:03.37]Yeah and I'm buddies with Alfred we about to [05:06.31]Disembowel them gut 'em and scalp 'em yeah [05:08.48]This is 'bout to be the bloodiest outcome [05:10.44]'Cause we gon' make you bleed with every cut from this album [05:12.94]So I'm choppin' 'em up like Dahmer [05:14.51]The nut job with the nuts that are bigger than Jabba the Hutt [05:16.09]I'm in the cut and I'm out for the blood [05:17.38]It's lookin' like it's that time of the month [05:18.64]Carvin' 'em up with the bars while I sharpen 'em up dog and a mutt [05:20.91]I'm gonna f**k your mom in the butt with a thermometer f**kin' phenomenal but [05:22.76]Y'all'll get cut the f**k up like abdominals if you don't vámonos [05:24.69]I keep droppin' like dominos the formidable abominable [05:26.37]Stompin' a mudhole in my comp even if it's off the top of the dome [05:29.21]Son 'em get the Coppertone [05:31.07]I'm at the Stop and Go coppin' the Mop and Glo [05:33.12]Got your stomach in knots like you swallowed rope [05:34.67]You out of pocket though like a motherf**kin' wallet stole [05:36.90]Wait why'd the beat cut off [05:38.58]F**k it